The role of the parents in figuring the child’s personality cannot be ignored. The bond between the parents and children highly affects the processes of development of the children.
Thus, every parent should provide a warm and positive environment for their children so that they can flourish and attain their full potential.
Ultimately, parents should always put their maximum effort to support both the
Parenting is a Hard Job
In addition to the biological nurturing and the bond between the parents and children, there is a social aspect of raising a child which is an important mechanism for the survival of humanity.
The task of the parents is to provide the material and mental needs of their child in order to guarantee the formation of the following generations.
Parenting can be defined as the role of the adults to raise their child by focusing on the development of them in all aspects of life such as intellectual and physical from their birth to their adulthood.
It is the main factor affecting the welfare of the family and the development of the child. Consequently, it is possible to say that apart from the biological bond between the parents and the children, the social and psychological relationship between them to be thriving until the child doesn’t need the support from the parents.
You are Responsible for the Decisions You Make
The targets of the parenting involve serving for the health and security of the children and passing on the crucial values to them. It is noteworthy to mention that the more healthy the relationship between you and your child, the more successful your child will be in his/her adulthood.
Basically speaking, parenting is to utilize some set of decisions for providing the child with successful socialization skills. These set of decisions consist of a variety of attitudes in the case of problems in your child’s behaviors such as lying and aggression.
It is Okay to Feel Overwhelmed
You might feel fed up with the challenges of parenting from time to time as there is no one and correct way of making decisions. Also, they vary a lot from situation to situation which makes your task even harder.
How you react to your child’s wrongdoings show differences as your child grows up and enter into the various developmental stages.
Nevertheless, the influence between the child and the parent is a reciprocal one which is the reason for the importance of your attitudes toward your children.
To be a good parent means taking the responsibility of raising a child who would have the capacity to realize his/her potential when he/she becomes an adult. It is the task of a good parent to behave his/her children in a way that they would become the best of all the possible outcomes.
One of the most important responsibilities of the parents is to guide them through their psychological developments by teaching them the skills for socializing. It would help children to be successful in their school life as well as professional life in the future.
In the case that parents are not ready to take on the task of raising a child, it becomes a rather hard job for them. You should remember that parenting is learned through experience considering the particularities of each child. There is no set of strict rules for parenting except for your responsibility to fulfill the child’s needs so that he/she can have a healthy life.
You should provide your child with a safe atmosphere and appreciate him/her existence by showing love and intimacy as a parent. Regardless of your parenting style, love must be the fundamental element of your relationship with your child.
In short, let love be your guide in parenting.
Here are 10 Tips to Help you Become a Better Parent
1. Be a Decent Role Model to Your Child
The main source of learning for children is the actions of their parents. They observe how you behave others which makes it one of the most crucial parts of successful parenting.
You should always ask yourself what would be the effect of your actions on your child before reacting momentarily. For example, according to the recent research children who are the victim of violence at home show more tendency to act aggressively at school.
You can transfer positive attitudes and personality traits to your child by being a good role model for him/her. For instance, you can teach him/her helping others without waiting for a prize in turn by showing him/her that you share your meal with a poor person. You should treat your child in a way that you want him/her treat others. You should approach him/her with gratitude and kindness so that he/she can implement these positive attitudes in his/her relationships aside from the one with you.
2. Pay Attention to Communication
You should carry out an explanatory communication with your child. You should express the reasons for the basic rules and moral values to him/her just like you make it for adults.
It is crucial that you converse more about the reasons behind your expectations from him/her and the possible results of not complying with the rules so that they can understand them instead of following the ready-made maxims.
Also, set realistic and clear expectations for your child.
You should involve in solving the problems together with your child by suggesting options and expressing your thoughts and feelings while listening to him/her.
Furthermore, you should attentively review your child’s offers without being judgemental. It will help him/her follow the decisions more eagerly.
3. Refrain from Hard Punitions
Although many parents acknowledge discipline and punishment as the same, discipline should aim at teaching the child how to control him/herself in a constructive and positive way.
Through a positive discipline, parents can observe what the child needs to be successful and can guide him/her.
The emotional bond between the children and parents built through these experiences influence the behavioral development of the child positively.
Moreover, parents should definitely refrain from using violence on their children. According to Steinberg, children who are the victim of violence at home demonstrate aggressive behaviors at school in order to solve the conflicts with their friends.
You should put an effort to make your children take decent and appropriate decisions in their social interactions with other people by utilizing some rules. Thus, they would be responsible adults when they grow up.
For example, you can set rules such as finishing the homework before playing video games at home and prohibit swearwords and making fun of
4. Love Your Children Regardless of the Circumstances
You should appreciate your child and make him/her feel special by showing your ultimate love for them because children need it to thrive.
It is your duty as a parent to guide your child by fixing their mistakes in order to improve his/her behaviors.
While disciplining your child in cases of conflict you should never despise and harshly criticize
Show your child your unconditional love even if you compel them to correct their behaviors.
Also, you should avoid assigning your children tags such as bad or spoiled as it would have adverse effects on his/her self-regarding. You should make your child see that your reactions to his/her behaviors have nothing to do with your love and respect for your child.
The self-worth of a child is mainly determined by the love that they are sure you have for them regardless of the circumstances.
5. Help Your Child Build a Strong Self-Esteem
Children start to develop an image of the self through their observation of the parent’s attitudes towards them. How you approach them influences how they build this image. For example, the language you use in your communication with him/her, the nonverbal communication and your voice while speaking to him/her determines their self-esteem.
As a result, it depends on you to raise a confident and self-reliant child by appreciating them and giving them the space to be themselves.
You should refrain from making comparisons between your child and his/her peers in order not to make them feel unworthy.
The self-regarding of the child is highly dependent on spending quality time with him/her rather than spending so much time together.
Sometimes we as parents cannot give our full attention to our child while spending time with him/her because of thinking of our following task in our intense work routine etc.
As a result, we miss the opportunities to have improving conversations and engage in fun activities with our children when they need it.
Also, you shouldn’t use words like stupid when commenting on their actions so that they don’t feel unimportant.
You should carefully choose your words in a way that you don’t hurt your child and prove your faith in them.
6. Observe Your Child Carefully
In order to understand your child, you should pay attention to their actions.
Through observation, you can better grasp your child’s wishes and the traits of his/her personality. Also, it enables you to compare their behaviors with the expectations for his/her age.
Additionally, you can see if your child needs professional help for not meeting the requirements of his/her developmental stage and has atypical behaviors.
7. Provide an Intimate and Warm Environment to Your Child
You should make your children feel secure and loved. The environment they are raised needs to be foreseeable and you should be with them to support their growth.
They depend on their parents who acknowledge their worth by knowing them closely.
According to Maslow, the children who feel safe at home are more capable of taking risks and have higher self-esteem.
Also, they need to live in an environment where they can feel secure from the physical and psychological damages and violence.
8. Have Healthy Bonding with Your Child
Regardless of their age, children seek love and intimacy from their parents. The parents should utilize a variety of tactics for socializing with their kids which they can demonstrate their supportive and caring attitude towards them.
By showing your intimate feelings to your children, you automatically support them. In this way, you prove your interest in their lives and their feelings. Consequently, you can have a secure bonding with your child.
9. Allocate Time to Your Children
It is hard to spend time with your children if you are working full time. It is highly probable that you cannot even find time to eat a meal with your family. However, remember that the amount the time you spend with your child is less important than the quality of it.
In order to spend time with your child, you can engage in some activities together such as preparing the table for the dinner, playing card games and take a walk outside. Your child will never forget those precious moments with you.
The neglected children generally transgress the rules in order to draw the attention of their parents.
You should schedule regular activities with your kid such as watching a movie every weekend or go shopping on Wednesdays.
Also, there are alternative ways that you can make your child feel that you are always with him/her by giving them presents or sticking love notes to their books.
Especially if you are a parent to a teenager, you should never miss the opportunities when he/she wants to talk to you. It is because they are usually harder to get in touch mentally and emotionally.
10. Learn More About Child Development
According to educators, parent’s knowledge of the development of children is the best qualification they would have. Every stage of the child’s development requires you to be prepared for novel and various wishes and needs of them. Thus, consider widening your knowledge about your psychological and physical capacities in order to find the most appropriate way of communicating with them and help them improve.
Without exception, each child goes through a series of developmental stages. These stages are divided approximately according to the age groups which demonstrate similar patterns of behaviors and emotions.
The most active phase of
During this period, the foundations of their future development are built as well as their beliefs, habits, personality traits and their perception of both themselves and the world.
Therefore, you should know about your impacts on the development of the child.
Parenting is an ongoing process.
The role of the parents varies in accord with the age of the child. While it is essential to feed and look after them in the early childhood, in the following ages it becomes less important even though it continues to stay as a requirement.
When the child is more close to maturity, you should get him/her ready for being an independent individual.
Ultimately, you should always keep learning more about child raising by consulting other parents around you, reading books on the subject and asking professionals the questions in your mind.
Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11(1), 56-95.